Christina Rossetti

WHO HAS SEEN THE WIND?
NEITHER I NOR YOU;
BUT WHEN THE LEAVES HANG TREMBLING,
THE WIND IS PASSING THROUGH.
WHO HAS SEEN THE WIND?
NEITHER YOU NOR I;
BUT WHEN THE TREES BOW DOWN THEIR HEADS,
THE WIND IS PASSING BY.

nevermind.
I'll just dance.

pre-panic attack rant

It's not that I don't enjoy school, I just wish I had a little time to read something non required. To curl up and finally finish Lolita or a Chiam Potok book or Isaiah. That's not to say that I don't enjoy learning about Freudian humor and Kafka and Aristophanes, I just want to do it according to my own timing.
College politics and bullshit are exhausting- especially when someone takes a vast and interesting subject like Anti-Semitism and, somehow, manages to make it one of the most boring.
Seriously, here's what it's like every Tuesday and Thursday. My professor supplies the dead horse then we, as "young scholars", supply the bats, and for an hour and twenty minutes we BEAT AND BEAT AND BEAT the dead horse. Then we analyze the experience of beating the dead horse and how we might apply it to outside sources available in Langsam library. His only redeeming quality is that he slightly resembles George Clooney's ugly and less charming brother.
Not all of this whole college experience is terrible. Like today for example, when an unsuspecting, overweight & underdressed, divorced mom had to read her response to Philip Roth's The Breast in front of class. I had to put my head down because I felt like I had somehow walked into the sex scene of a Danielle Steele novel. That wasn't the best part though, oh no, it was the girl behind me's comment that was GOLD:
"It sounds to me like you ENJOY the penis, you want to USE the penis, you just don't want TO BE the penis"
I screamed on the inside. Even the professor was embarrassed- and she's laughed at a rape joke in class.
The now flushed, dirty mommy's response?
"Yep! That's about right!!"
Yeah, it's moments like those that make everything worth it.

Panic Mode: ON

UPDATE:

wise blood

I need you to do me a favor.

First, I want you to go here and listen:
http://wiseblood.bandcamp.com/

Secondly, I want you to go here and listen more:
http://www.myspace.com/wisebloodwivesblood

Lastly, I want you to go here and download:
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?zykwzhmgnmf

And if it's not too much trouble, I want you to go out into the streetz and tell all your friends about wise blood.
I know it's a lot. It's just that have faith in you.
Thank you & you're welcome.

THIS IS ME-

when I need to form words:

commitment

The snow-covered ice on the sidewalks is forcing me to walk carefully. Slow and steady. Well, I'm tired of walking slow and steady. I've been doing it for months now. Maybe I just tire easily?
My baby, Bathsheva, has become my joy. She seems to scurry her way into my thoughts at various times during the day. As ridiculous as it may sound, she's taught me to be more patient and gentle. I think this commitment thing could work out between us.
Here's Woven Hand- one thing I'm fully and unquestionably committed to:

For I am everything
I am everything
I am everything that he is not

dead man's bones

Not only is Ryan Gosling a great actor, but apparently he's also a great musician too.